Monkey Theory

The Infinite Monkey Theorem posits that a monkey hitting keys at random on a typewriter keyboard for an infinite amount of time will almost surely type a given text, such as the blog known as Doyel's Dribbles.

In this post, Doyel calls Paterno a selfish,old man:

Old isn't an insult, by the way. It's an adjective.

But he's old. And he's selfish. And why? Because he is campaigning for the Big Ten to expand by adding Syracuse, Pittsburgh or Rutgers. "Not in that order," he says.

Classy, JoePa. Hey, wait. Is that a siren? Was another of your players just arrested?

I really do try to cut my fellow bloggers some slack. We're all just trying to put up something worth reading. And when you live in a glass house, you should avoid throwing bricks.

But seriously? What was the point to this post? To educate us on the use of adjectives? To take a pot shot at Penn State's recent woes with the law? To use this as a platform for yet another Joe Should Retire diatribe?

I could spend more time responding to this, but some of the comments have already done so eloquently (which is an adverb.)

Doyel, of course JoePa is being selfish. That doesn't surprise me. What does surprise me is that his selfishness seems to offend you. Why would you expect him to behave any differently? He believes the Big Ten would be more successful with a twelfth team. Why would he be upset if pirating that team from the Big East made the Big East weaker?

Should he take the same approach to his recruiting? "Gee, I would really like the best middle linebacker prospect in the country to play for my Lions, but Purdue has had some down years... maybe I ought to let them have a crack at him instead?"

Football is a competitive sport and business. What you seem to be implying is that the world of college football would be better off by constructing boundaries to limit that competition. If the Big Ten feels it is better off with Syracuse or another of the Big East schools, and if that school feels it is better off with the Big Ten, why would you prevent them from changing the structure of the conference? If the Big East is at risk of becoming defunct because of the loss of one of its teams, then it needs to find ways to improve its conference so that teams no longer want to find another home. If they don't, then they will eventually succumb to the pressures of the game's evolution.

We're all big boys and girls here Doyel. JoePa is shouldn't have to pull his punches to satisfy your skewed sense of fairness.

See, now? That's well thought out and worth reading. ParisYankee took the high road. Or, you could take the low road . . .

Bald, isn't an insult, by the way. It's an adjective. If he had hair, I'd have titled this thing, "Doyel, incompetent man with hair."

Yawn. Once again, nothing but drivel. I'd expected that one day you'd write something worthwhile. You should take your own advice. Retire already.

Whatever.