Thursday, September 19, 2013

Weekly Game Guide: Golden Flush Edition

Penn State is a 20 point favorite over the Golden Flushes of Kent State.  Coming off an 11-3 season with a heartbreaking bowl loss to Arkansas State, KSU has struggled.  Their only win is a 17-10 decision over Liberty. 

Now it's not like Penn State has come out of the gate running, but this should be a game to work on some of the things we need to work on.  Hackenberg should have another nice outing stat-wise, but look for some back-up time for Ferguson.

We pause now for a tirade.  This is kind of like a rant but has more syllables.  The Citizens Bank Button for this week reads FLASH LIGHTS OUT.  Seriously?  Is this the best we can do?  Someone asked me today what the button meant.  I DON'T REALLY KNOW.  We're playing Kent State.  They are the flashes.  Hence . . .

Is it a reference to a flashlight?  Turning it off?

We're going to play lights out?  Against the flash?

Are we flashing lights--sending out an S.O.S.?

Over the years, there have been a number of old standbys . . .

TURN THE TIDE.

SUBDUE PURDUE

QUIET THE 'NOIS

et cetera.

There have even been some creative ones . . .

NO GREECE LIGHTNING

DRIVING MICH CRAZY (playing on Driving Miss Daisy)

MICHIGAN IMPOSSIBLE (Playing on Mission Impossible)

SLEEPLESS IN ANN ARBOR (Sleepless in Seattle--not sure what it has to do with football, but I assume they were supposed to be losing sleep worrying about playing Penn State.  Yeah, that's the ticket.  It also appears that playing THEM elicits movie references.)

I'm just a bit disappointed in this week's button.  Oh, well.  I'm sure Citizen's Bank won't lose any sleep . . . in Ann Arbor, Seattle, or Beaver Stadium.

When you have to explain the joke, it's probably not that funny.  CLEAN!  QUEEN--to make it funny!  When you have to explain the button . . .time to get a new slogan.

Tonight, Clemson is currently leading the Wolfpack, 20-7 going to the fourth quarter.

In the Big Ten:

Iowa (17 points) takes on Western Michigan.  GO HAWKS!

Minnesota (off) takes on San Jose State.  GO GOPHERS!

Michigan State travels to South Bend to fight the Irish (7).  GO SPARTY!

Illinois doesn't play.  Will anyone notice?

THEM (18) travels to UConn.  GO Huskies!

The Cornhuskers try to recover against South Dakota State.  GO HUSKERS!

Missouri (5) head to Bloomington to take on the Hoosiers.  GO HOOSIERS!

In the first match-up of two Big Ten teams this season, Wisconsin (23.5) hosts Purdue.  I have to admit that rooting against Wisconsin ain't as much fun now that Bielema is gone.  ON WISCONSIN!

Northwestern hosts Maine.  Remember the Maine?  Not so much.  GO CATS!

Ohio State hosts Florida A and M.  Nothing but pain there.

Maryland (5) plays West Virginia at M&T Stadium.  Don't ask me.  I have no idea where that is.  GO TWERPS!

Rutgers (off) hosts Arkansas.  GO KNIGHTS!

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